I have always been a Cool Ranch man. I remember the year the flavor came out, it changed my feelings on Doritos forever. Before Cool Ranch Doritos, I used to prefer these big “welfare” bags of cheesy Doritos imitation chips. I liked them because the chips were extra cheesy and there was a picture of Garield on the bag wearing a sombrero, poncho and holding maracas.

My cat Nitro used to climb into the bag if we left it unattended and would eat the fuck out of those chips. We found this so funny that we would let him have the chips and his tail could be seen wagging out of the bag as he carved out the bounty with his maw. My mother would often say “nitro get out of the bag”, with a chuckle, My brother and I would tell her to leave him be and continued playing nintendo.

After Nitro left due to injuries sustained in battle I pretty much just started eating Cool Ranch. Like Nitro the Garfield chips are no longer with us. If they were, I would still have a bag on occasion in memory of him, and see if my new cats also enjoy his favorite dinner.